I've learned that we can never get time back. We can always make more money or buy more stuff, but we can't get moments back. At the end of the day, all opportunities for adventure, fun or reaching out to others have to wait until the next day.
We always have time for the things we want to do. My days took a dramatic shift after reading Stephen Covey's book, "First Things First" http://www.shared-visions.com/explore/literature/firstthings.htm We want to take care of ourselves and be satisfied as mothers so that we can identify and meet the needs of our children.
I need to take hold of the timeless moments where I can hold our children close and tell them how much joy they bring to us and how much they mean to us. I get the best response from our girls when I plop myseIf down on the floor and just sit there for a bit. They run towards me and know that I'm making myself available to them. I told my girls today that problems will always come in life, but that I promise to help them through it. How well are our children getting to know us each day? Do they know that we have their best interests at heart? What will our children remember and say about us after we're gone?
Sometimes it's a struggle to get those precious moments into our day because I get driven to accomplish certain tasks. How do I decide which tasks can wait, and for how long? In actuality, a mother has a manager position in the household. When I can't do it all myself, I either have to bring others in to help me or I have to downscale my expectations. Outside help can either be paid or unpaid. For homemade meals, some mothers use meal prep services where they put together 8 or 12 meals for their families. http://www.dashingdishes.com/Some families have nannies or childcare. I opt for the downscaling option because family bonding time is important to me. Children bond with the people in their household, whoever they happen to be.
I like to simplify my life so that I can fit important things into my day. I find a tremendous relief in being able to write down tasks on To-Do Lists, daytimers or calendars. My time management systems act as my second brain. When I'm reminded of tasks that need doing, I make sure to jot them down. As a first-time Mom, I remember waking up from naps and spending precious time wondering, "Baby's asleep, what should I do first?" I later decided that it was a good time to take a shower, make phone calls, check e-mails, start supper or do laundry. I was able to focus myself more by adding columns to my To-do list such as "When Baby's awake/asleep", "Morning/Afternoon/ Evening", "When Daddy's home", etc. I got quick direction from my list and it helped me to feel ahead of the game.
As a working Mom, I had to shift my thinking in several areas. I have learned that it's better to do a task a little at a time than to not start them at all. I start on a task, knowing that I may not be able to finish it in one sitting. I can empty the dishwasher one level at a time if need be. I find that my husband doesn't mind checking on a meal that's already set cooking. I've learned to notice the capabilities of others and tasks that others take on independently. It's important for me to effectively communicate what I need from those around me. I've also learned that I need to take care of myself and allow myself some fun every week. When my work load is heavy and I need inspiration, I turn to videos such as "The Invisible Woman" found at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YU0aNAHXP0&feature=player_embedded I don't want to forget the reasons behind my choices.
Michelle is an author and entrepreneur for a continuing education and business development company showing people how to build business success. Find out more by calling 1-800-719-8268 ext. 45455. Feel free to contact Michelle at timewithmama@shaw.ca She looks forward to hearing from you.
